Category Archives: Poem

Have you ever……..? …..Poem

Have you ever stopped and starred
At a flower open wide
And marvelled at it’s structure
And beauty inside………?

Have you ever silently watched
A raindrop weave down a pane of glass
Or the wind through the trees
With birds flying past…….?

Have you ever stopped ……
To smile at a stranger in the street
Or better still, take a seat beside them
And listen and chat happily…….?

Have you ever simply sat
And stared at the world beyond
The detail and the happenings
That otherwise would have gone……?

When did you last give yourself time to simply stop, watch and stare?
I do a lot of that nowadays….you don’t know what you’re missing……..❤️….give it a go and see what happens ………..

Reliving the past in the present……Poem….

I held a tiny baby
in my arms the other night
Along with tiny helping hands
We laughed and went about our day

The time was now
But I was young
The baby and the toddler,
My daughters, not just anyone

Voices whispering in the night
Laughing, plotting, confusing
Turning my world upside down
And I wake to the echo of silence

And think…..and look around me
It was only a dream
But nice to hold those 2 tiny humans
To relive their childhood once more…….

I met a young woman…….Poem

I met a young woman
Just the other day
She sat down beside me
And we chatted away..

She seemed to know a lot about me
Asked if I’d like a nice cuppa tea
She settled down and told me about her life
So I sat and listened contentedly

It was as though she knew me
In a vague familiar way
She smiled and we compared
The years that had gone by

Of children growing up
We had so much in common
Our love of the outdoors
Our love of sport more than anyone

But as we grew older
That’s where our lives diverged and similarities end
She so private, yet with so much drive
Me so carefree, yet today I’m sat here tired of life

We finished our tea
Said our goodbyes
Wished each other luck
And then we parted

And I sat alone
Gathering my thoughts
Who was that woman…….?

Well………… that woman was me…

You also listen to me read it here on Dementia Diaries….

https://dementiadiaries.org/entry/11518/wendy-reads-a-poem-written-for-dementia-diaries

Dedication to Twitter…..Poem

Oh twitter, oh twitter
I do love you so
You allow me to witter
No matter how slow

The kindness of friends met
Thru this bright blue bird
Has brought such happiness
To voices once unheard

Yes, like in any world
Evil lurks all round
Trying to sadden our days
But so rarely found

So my silent world of company
I hope you realise why
You’re so important in my day
Even when my brain won’t play……

 

Guest Poem………

I love sharing poems from other people living with dementia as every voice is important and if I can share that voice then that makes me happy.

I was recently sent an email from a lovely lady in New Zealand. She originally lived in Bradford and wrote “I was involved, way back in 1992 when Professor Tom Kitwood there ran his first dementia group” – how amazing…❤️

The other day Barbara emailed me this lovely letter and poem:

“Can I share with you a poem I wrote recently, in order
to try to share with other ‘how it is’, but knowing I could only do it
in advance by sitting quietly and letting the words flow. I found that
what I had written even surprised me, mentioning aspects I hadn’t yet
admitted to myself.”

She asked me to include her email at the bottom just in case anyone wanted to get in touch…..

FACING UP TO DEMENTIA

The time has come to stand still and face my dementia,
Not from the position of “Barbara-who-was”, but instead
That changing, disappointing, rather less exciting and interesting
“Barbara diminished”. All euphoria is gone. Capacity is reduced.
Sadness tinged with fear and doubt wait in the wings.

Life so far has been very challenging but rich beyond measure;
Very few regrets, lots of love and living adventurously, held
Deeply within a Quaker spirituality which makes sense of,
Accepts and allows, guides and develops, challenges and supports
In tune with Andy’s sharing of a life lived as well as possible.

It is not over, yet, but it is changed, in unfamiliar ways.
My life has had its glasses removed so that the focus is unclear
And things disappear, from sight and capacity. And get harder
So that ‘letting go’ becomes a daily necessity in order to
To maintain balance, temper and a sense of unwell-being.

My ‘over-the-top’ approach to life, so enjoyed
Has to be reined in and that is hard to do
Because it is who I have been and I don’t
Want to let it go, because without it
Who will I be? And will I still be loved and valued?

Will I still manage to love the ‘shadow’ of her
Former self that day by day I transform into?
Will I enjoy her and her antics when energy and motivation
Drain slowly away? Will I be able and willing
To release her, at the right moment, to escape the worst?

Will my spirit hold firm, shine brightly and
Hold my hand tightly as I “Let go, let God”
More profoundly, more radically until just
A memory of what has been? It is not
As though I wouldn’t have died anyway!

What do I need for this unexpected journey?
I need to accept and value the me that wakes
Each morning. I need to let others support and
Guide me and stop thinking I know best – the
Very hardest thing, to be vulnerable, quiet, open.

I need to seek and take support, advice and direction
And be aware of my inner voice, that I have trusted
So implicitly and has guided me so well. It may be
A light which flickers unreliably before it goes out.
I need to love and be loved, enjoy, play, be hugged.

Perhaps that poor, abandoned, unloved little girl
Who was me at the beginning can have
A second ‘childhood’, in the light of all she has
Achieved, of feeling secure, blessed, embracing
What comes to pass with positivity, love and acceptance

Barbara <barbaraspoem@gmail.com>

 

Guest Poems from a talented mum no longer with us…

Recently I had the most wonderful email from Tove in Finland after having read my book. In it she told me how her mother was 56 when diagnosed with Alzheimers  and sadly died at 64. In the email Tove said

She was working with the elderly  and helping them to develop their memory. And then she lost her own memory…She was a poet in her spare time and she wrote many poems before it also was taken away from her”

I asked if I could share 2 of them with you as I think they are beautiful…a very talented lady….

Let me stay

among my dreams
and memories
yet a while
Let me see the ocean
in the sunset
and the beach
Let me listen to
grandchildrens laughter
and noice
one more day, please
Don’t run towards me
you cruel reality
Stay
Take
another way
So when you finally
knock on my door
I’m not at home
I’m perhaps already gone
   – Lillemor Eklund 2005
and finally this one…
When I no longer can pronounce my name
When the silence is hanging over my thoughts, like a mountain
Hug me, keep me close
Make me feel safe
Whisper my name
over and over again
Til I know
who I am
Wish me
wild and beautiful dreams
in the darkness
that has captured me
hold my hand
follow me some of the way”
Lillemor Eklund 1949-2013 

A not so secret love affair……..

A repeat poem from 2016 today to set everyone up for the weekend of their choice…..mine would be sat with Billy….

Mysterious, serene and handsome
And always there for me
Generous with his cuddles
And never answers back you see

We often simply sit
And while away the hours
No need for conversation
Just relaxation is the power……..

Of a cat named Billy

image

Bitter Sweet Success……..Poem

Right now I’m living in a strange surreal world
A world where people are kind
Making kind comments
Doing kind things

My name up on posters
In towns far and wide
On radio and press
My name appears constantly

Almost makes me sad though….

Strange how dementia has brought me success…..

Ohhh that it was for another reason……..in a different lifetime

When I Type…….Poem

I apparently wrote this poem in 2017……..the sentiment is still the same today thank goodness…..

When I type
Words come freely
Fingers work quickly
No sign of dementia
When I type

When I type
I can pretend
I can be normal
You just wouldn’t know
I’m not like you

Until I stop
Until I speak
Until I walk
Until I stand before you
Reading my words………..

I wish I had a recording of the old me as  others would then understand how the alien hesitant childlike voice that has now taken up residence,  is a total stranger.

Never judge a book by the cover……………