Last weeks blog:
…brought such a response, especially from people reaffirming what I thought was true. Sometimes, I wonder if it’s ‘just me’ as dementia is a lonely place sometimes.
I live alone yet have the wonderful company of my silent community on Twitter to keep me company or I can be in a crowded room yet still feel alone, such is the chaos and confusion all the noise and conversation makes.
So it’s why I often put things on my blog, just to see people’s response; to check I’m not alone in my thoughts.
I know I’m lucky to be able to do this – to type a blog, to have a silent conversation on Twitter. Typing being my escape from dementia.
Those without this virtual support must rely heavily on those around them, if they have people. For those living alone, or whose families have deserted them, it must be a very lonely and confusing existence. Although, for some, maybe it isn’t……
I see a chappie frequently in town who clearly in my eyes is living with dementia. The locals refer to him as ‘not quite right’, but not in an unkind way. He’s always alone but he sits happily in the bus station on the benches and chats to anyone politely who sits beside him, about the weather, and smiles contentedly. He gets on the same buses and travels to the terminus and back and then hops on the next familiar one or repeats the first. Most drivers seem to know him and are kind and understanding. He’s happy and content in his trundling world. This is the routine he’s devised for himself.
So not everyone has insight, purposely creates strategies and solutions. They just get on with their life as best they can. Perhaps they’re not even aware of their diagnosis. Helping themselves and hoping others will be kind along the way.
However, it’s when kindness gets lost and forgotten that problems arise. Like when an unfamiliar, possibly new driver, wouldn’t let him back on the same bus as he’d already been on it 3 times that day. He then sat alone on the bench, confused and sad, his routine broken by unnecessary words. Moments later, I was about to move and sit by him, when another man sat down and started chatting to him and the smile appeared on his face and all was right in the world again for him……because someone was kind.
The villages who catch my bus always make sure I get on the right bus, especially if its busy or the bus parks in a different place. All eyes are on me, as I often wait in a quiet spot further down. I appreciate their kindness especially when it’s confusing.
Kindness costs nothing and can make someone’s day. Harsh words cost nothing and can throw someone’s world into disarray……I know which I like best…..how about you?