Different me each day

It’s taken me a while, but I’ve realised that each day can be slightly or hugely different. Some days, like yesterday,  you can wake up and your head is tangle free and feels as clear as a bell – you can fool yourself into thinking that the Alzheimer’s has left you for a few minutes or hours. It does play cruel games though as it can change without warning and before you know it, you’re lost and confused. The most extreme example I’ve experienced is at work. I was sat in my office working quite normally and needed to go out for some reason. I was stood in the corridor next to my office and just didn’t know where my office was or who was behind all the doors. I’d been warned that this could happen and that it hopefully would only last a few minutes, so had developed a plan already. I walked to the end of the corridor and found the cloakroom. I sat in there for a while and eventually could feel my head clearing and after a while I could walk back down the corridor and fit the pieces of the jigsaw back together again. It was such a strange feeling though, as there was no panic involved, just confusion.

Another incident, which some of you may be familiar with after a few too many sherbets, was waking up and not knowing what day it was or whether I should go to work. We’ve probably all experienced that feeling at some point after drinking too much. If it’s due to drinking, it will eventually dawn on you what day it is. I don’t drink and I remember waking up and sitting on the bed really not knowing what day it was or what I was suppose to do now. Did I go to work and if so was I due to go today? Again, I’d been warned of such confusion so I used my phone to find out what day it was and used my calendar to see if I was due at work. The phone has proved to be a life saver – even though I’ve only got a little brick! I don’t know what I’d do without it. I’m so lucky that I’ve always been highly organised so I haven’t had to learn that new skill.

About wendy7713

On the 31st July 2014 I was diagnosed with Young Onset Dementia. I may not have much of a short term memory anymore but that date is one I’ll never forget. I’m 58 years young, live happily alone in Yorkshire, have 2 daughters and I’m currently still in full time employment in the NHS. However, I’m now in the process of taking early retirement to give me a chance of enjoying life while I’m still me. I've started this blog to allow me, in the first instance, to write all my thoughts before they’re lost. If anyone chooses to follow my ramblings it will serve as a way of raising awareness on the lack of research into Alzheimer's. It will hopefully convey the helplessness of those diagnosed with dementia, as there is no cure – the end is inevitable. However, I’m also hoping I can convey that, although we've been diagnosed, people like me still have a substantial contribution to make; we still have a sense of humour; we sill have feelings. I’m hoping to show the reality of trying to cope on a day to day basis with the ever-changing environment that dementia throws at those diagnosed with the condition. What I want is not sympathy. What I want is simply to raise awareness.

1 thought on “Different me each day

  1. Just read your latest blog. Never give up indeed!! There’s always a way…and just as you’ll never give up neither will we in our support!!

    Liked by 2 people

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